I Hate Myself for Loving You

It becomes relevant, eventually

I'm a political person, a very political person. So much so that I've chosen to do it for money for the rest of ever. So as you might expect, my politics drive a lot of my actions. After all, why the hell else would someone put themselves through the act of canvassing? You have to love the fight to do shit like that.

That said, my politics doesn't really drive my acts as a consumer. Last year when everybody was getting all pissed off (in either direction, really) about Chick-Fil-A, I kept on eating it. When Deepwater Horizon became the world's largest money geyser I kept going to BP stations, if that's what was close. Was it because I supported these companies in all their actions and positions? Nope. Why? Because Chick-Fil-A is goddamn good. No, I mean that's definitely part of it, but there's more to it. First of all, I mean, this. If a company's owner believes something fine, as long as they aren't legislating it I don't see why I should care. Second, and more importantly, I don't think most boycotts are effective today, given the way companies do business and the way executives get paid. Consider that CEOs today now make two hundred seventy-three times the average workers salary, obviously taking care of the company every man is not at the top of the priority list. If a CEO, like say Chick-Fil-A's owner, has a deeply held, dyed-in-the-wool ignorant old codge sort of conviction, he's not giving it up. EVER. If his profits drop by 10% because of that conviction (which pretty much never happens anyway), he still isn't going to change his mind, and if they did he'd gladly just lay off some people instead of actually changing his position. So when you boycott most places, especially places that are franchised and individually owned (like gas stations) you aren't punishing this guy, you're more likely punishing him:

Look in his eyes, the pain is all in the eyes.

This position of mine has made a lot of people, typically on my side of the aisle, very angry.

Whateva.

That said, recently, I've run into one that I do feel pretty shitty about, and can't stop myself from indulging in. Oberweis Dairy. Oberweis is, predictably, owned by Jim Oberweis, who in addition to being a business owner is a professional asshole and a State Senator in my very own Great State of Illinois. First of all, Jim Oberweis has made it quite clear, he wants to be everything but a dairy owner. He's run for office SIX times! Five of those runs ended in terrible failure, as he slowly lowered his sights from United State Senator, to Governor, to House Rep, to finally a lowly State Senate seat (yet somehow people still bought that this time he really really had always wanted to be state senator). The man wants a constitutional amendment defining marriage in a blue state, he's almost comically anti-immigrant (for God's sake he's flying in his helicopter while bitching about impoverished minorities [perfectly good time to mention that he uses immigrant labor in his business]), supports right to work laws, and school vouchers that defund already cripplingly underfunded public schools. He's probably the most white-hot conservative individual in the Illinois Senate. But it's more personal than that. My brother ran his general election opponent's campaign. It was a race that couldn't be won, and to be fair, despite all the circumstances, the campaign outperformed the district's conservative lean. Still, he had to deal with Oberweis personally, fighting tooth and nail to get the district as far from him as possible.

I was warned about his products. About the ice cream, about the milkshakes, about the blessed chocolate milk. I was warned that if I had them, there'd be no going back. Again, I'm not one for boycotts, but I can get all of those things elsewhere, and I really didn't want to line his pockets. But I tried them anyway, and, well.

It's good, wayyyyyyy too good. I wasn't even entirely sure milk could taste that good. It's also actually available here in town, which means I have a quandary. Except to say it's a quandary is not quite correct, given that I've pretty much resigned myself to buying their shit now. I'm a passionate individual, and I most certainly have a side, but goddamn do I love good food. Do my dollars from the occasional gallon of milk (or the slightly more occasional half-gallon of chocolate milk [praise be its name]) make a big difference to Jim Oberweis or his future ambitions? No. Do I still feel like a bit of a tool for it? Yeah, totally. But it wasn't even remotely enough to stop me from ending up like this.

It's actually taunting me. Smug bastard.

And now a song from an artist, for which the post was named, that there is absolutely no shame in enjoying. Joan Jett: